I think pretty highly of myself when it comes to little mistakes and errors that plague most people. In fact, I think I’m nearly perfect unless someone else negatively impacts me or I am the victim of some unavoidable circumstance. I think my organization skills, planning, cleanliness, and foresight make me this way.
As I was cooking dinner, Julia was looking for something in one of the kitchen junk drawers.
Julia: “Uh oh. Whoever put the Wite-Out away last didn’t put the cap on right and it spilled in the drawer.”
Me: “Well I know it wasn’t me. I’m perfect. I never make mistakes so I have never even used Wite-Out.” (For the record, that is pretty close to true. Wite-Out just makes mistakes look worse, so if I do need a correction I always figure out another solution.)
Julia (not believing me): “Oh yeah…you’ve never made a mistake?”
Me: “Yeah you’re right. I’ve made two.” I motion to Susie and then to her. Julia pretends to get upset.
Julia spent a lot of the night trying to point out some kind of mistake to pin on me. At dinner, a piece of penne dropped off of my fork.
Julia (finally thinking she got me): “Ah ha! You made a mistake!!!”
Me (not even acknowledging her): “Did you see that?!? I dropped that penne perfectly where I wanted to on the toe of my shoe. Nobody could have done that as accurately as I did.”